Dating a man who has been widowed
His relationship status on the dating website was “widower” and his age 39.
I wasn’t sure that was a combination I wanted to take on, but my sister, who had my login details so she could snoop around on my behalf, thought that the fact that Tim had favourited my profile and he looked nice was enough to “give him a try”.
Then believe him, and pay attention to his actions. Some of you shared your positive experiences and thanked me. I’m happy to say that I’ve never had to experience the grief of losing a spouse.
My question is this – does this apply to widowers as well or is it fair to give him a little more time and just get busy with other things so I don’t put pressure on him?
He says he has always taken it slow in dating and this is nothing new.
Having a good picker means not only that you learn how to spot and avoid the jerks, but even more importantly, that you don’t miss the really good guys. When a man is in a happy relationship he pours himself into it. We’ve experienced a lot: love, heartbreak, successes, failures – and having lost a spouse is a very real possibility. I have also spent the past 8 years closely observing many women as they dated Ws.
And when it’s gone, he’s left with the kids (maybe) and his job (maybe). So if he knows what he wants and is ready for love again, he takes his search for a new partner seriously – and that’s the gem of dating a widower. But, as with all of those other big life experiences, being widowed isn’t the end of the story. Together they are traveling the world and running marathons. And it’s not like she had to ‘make him’ do it – he loved adding that to his life! Some have remained in great relationships with them (like Karen above).
They were quiet conversations, for some reason always after Sunday breakfast in the flat Tim had shared with Jane.